Monday, July 02, 2012

7. Intellectual and physical suicide

Nobody mistakes virtual life for real life, even though it has an emotional reality to many of us.  (Rheingold, 2000:22)

To many WELL members, the intellectual connection they find online is beguiling, enticing them to stay online and communicate with their friends.  There is an ease to virtual life that does not exist in many people’s physical life, and some find it more satisfying to live most of their life in their head, using online resources as an outlet and support system.  Intellectual power and glibness of writing rules online: people who may not otherwise have felt at ease while in the company of others can shine in a place where they have time to think of exactly what they want to say, and to communicate in writing, allowing them to rework their thoughts easily for the better.  Online, wit is king.  The constant availability of any online community, where wit runs rampant (or at least attempts to), can overshadow even physical cravings.

 Howard Rheingold describes how one early WELL member, Blair, was once addicted to cocaine, but managed to break that addiction.  Several years later, a friend left some cocaine for him while he was online and busily posting on the WELL.  Blair was aware of the cocaine but he could not tear himself away from the WELL long enough to consider taking the drug—he had replaced one addiction with another.  His online ties were cheaper than the drugs he had coveted and more comforting.  Blair used the WELL as a much-needed psychological output, calling it ‘Compconf Psychserv’ (Rheingold, 2000:19), and as Howard Rheingold said about Blair’s WELL addiction, ‘He was smart enough to know what had happened to him, even as it tightened its grip.’  (Rheingold, 2000:19)

Blair’s addictive personality caused him to become essential to the WELL’s conferences; his posts were so frequent that they enmeshed parts of the conferences.  That made his last WELL act especially antisocial: he used something called a scribble tool to seek out all his posts and delete them, leaving gaping holes in the WELL’s conferences and destroying whole sections of the community, as much as if he had set off a bomb in a busy and crowded office building.  Though removing comments on the WELL was allowed, at the author’s discretion, it left behind a blank post—glaring proof that something was once there.  Blair’s scribbling of his entire WELL history was ‘an act of intellectual suicide.’  (Rheingold, 2000:20)  It was then less of a shock to the community when he committed physical suicide several weeks later.  Another member, Tom Mandel, later used the scribble tool to erase much of his own history on the WELL as an act of anger, and a very effective way to lash out at other community members, but he did not take it as far as Blair.  Mandel later relied heavily on the WELL for emotional support through his traumatic death of leukemia.  Unlike Mandel, Blair used scribbling as a way of violently withdrawing from his intellectual community before forcibly removing himself from his physical community.

The scribble tool was invented by Bandy, a former WELL staff member, who quit after having an online argument with another WELL member.  Then he created a weapon—the scribble tool, which he used to damage the community by removing all his posts on the WELL.  Many WELL members used their programming skills to create programs, freeware to help other less technically inclined members, and to improve the community in general, but Bandy was the first member to create a weapon.  (Rheingold, 2000:20-22)


Webboards and MUDs got people used to receiving responses to their thoughts through the interface of a computer.  Another early aspect of personal computing which acclimated users to a responsive computer was self-counseling software.  It was a way for those who were not part of an online community to work on their psychological issues while remaining completely safe and anonymous.  The computer gave them the illusion of listening, but did not comprehend and thus was safer than even a doctor’s rule of absolute patient privacy.

No comments: